Spiritual Bypassing and Mental Health: Why a Trauma Informed Approach is Essential

Sep 16

In recent years, many people have turned to spirituality, mindfulness, and positive psychology in their search for mental wellness. Practices like meditation, affirmations, and life coaching have become popular tools to promote happiness and personal growth. Holistic and non-clinical strategies for wellness can be a vital resource for many and do a lot of good. But there can be a dark side. You can hardly visit a site like LinkedIn without encountering a slew of “good vibes only” type posts dripping with toxic positivity. While these messages can be meant to be encouraging, they can also contribute to something called spiritual bypassing, especially when individuals are dealing with trauma and clinical mental health issues. In the workplace, positive psychology and mindfulness bypassing is often used by HR departments and management to avoid addressing the hazards of the work environment in favor of shifting responsibility onto individuals to simply take better care of themselves and be more positive. Nevermind the poor organization, hostile environment, long hours, and low pay.

In the wellness, coaching, and spiritual self-help world, spiritual bypassing can occur to minimize and sometimes deny the reality of trauma and clinical mental health issues while inadvertently encouraging repression, denial, and avoidance of emotional pain. Your healer can only take you as far as they have gone themselves and as far as their training will allow. Sometimes healers may need you to not have the issues you actually have to continue taking you down the only path they know. This can be unconscious in the case of a well meaning but unaware helper, or a form of intentional gaslighting in the case of unscrupulous fly by night types.

What is Spiritual Bypassing?

Coined by psychologist John Welwood, the term spiritual bypassing refers to the tendency to use spiritual beliefs or practices as a way to avoid confronting difficult emotions, unresolved trauma, or the realities of mental health issues. Instead of processing these challenging feelings, individuals might mask or suppress them with platitudes such as "everything happens for a reason,” "just stay positive," or “just have faith.”

While this approach can create temporary relief, it ultimately delays the emotional work necessary for healing. Spiritual bypassing can lead to denial of painful emotions, avoidance of important conversations, and an overall sense of disconnect from oneself and others. Individuals may feel pressure to maintain an outward appearance of benefiting from the quick fix approach to stay connected to their support community. It might feel like progress in the short term, but it often results in deeper wounds and unresolved pain.

Facing trauma or uncomfortable truths about where deep issues stem from can be extremely uncomfortable for someone seeking help. For a helper untrained in trauma therapy or a clinical mental health discipline, it can be extremely uncomfortable for them to encounter deeper issues they are not prepared to help with. There is a motivation for avoidance and bypassing on both sides of the relationship. The person seeking help is hoping they will be able to solve all their problems with a straightforward feel good approach that doesn’t get into deep emotional work, and the helper is looking to avoid getting into deeper water they aren’t sure they can swim in.

How Positive Psychology and Coaching Can Inadvertently Encourage Bypassing

Positive psychology and life coaching focus on strengths, optimism, and personal development. They aim to empower individuals to create fulfilling lives by adopting a mindset of growth and possibility. However, when applied to people who are dealing with trauma or severe mental health issues, these approaches can sometimes inadvertently encourage bypassing. Here’s how:

Overemphasis on Positivity: In the quest to “think positive” or “focus on the bright side,” people might feel pressured to suppress negative emotions, grief, or anxiety. This can prevent them from processing trauma and confronting the root causes of their mental health symptoms.
Minimization of Suffering: In some coaching models, challenges are reframed as opportunities for growth without fully acknowledging the depth of pain or the impact of trauma. This can leave people feeling misunderstood or invalidated in their experiences.
Lack of Trauma-Informed Practices: Coaches and practitioners without specific training in trauma may not recognize how trauma impacts the brain, body, and behavior. Without this understanding, they might inadvertently encourage clients to push through their pain rather than work through it safely and gradually.

Why Trauma-Informed Care is Crucial for Mental Health

For individuals dealing with trauma, anxiety, depression, or PTSD, it’s essential to work with a trauma-informed mental health professional who understands the complexity of trauma and mental health issues. Trauma-informed care emphasizes safety, empowerment, and healing in a way that recognizes the emotional, psychological, and physiological impact of trauma.

Here’s why a trauma-informed approach is so important:

Understanding of Trauma Responses: Trauma manifests in many ways, including hypervigilance, emotional numbness, emotional dysregulation, dissociation, or flashbacks. A trauma-informed therapist can help clients identify and process these responses without judgment or pressure to "move on."
Safe Emotional Space: A trauma-informed professional creates an environment where clients feel safe to explore their emotions, no matter how uncomfortable or painful. This is crucial for trauma survivors who may have been invalidated or silenced in the past. Being vulnerable is hard enough, but when it isn’t received well due to the other person’s discomfort it can be retraumatizing and alienating.
Integration of Mind and Body: Trauma often lives in the body, affecting the nervous system and physical health. Trauma-informed care includes practices like somatic therapy or EMDR, which address the mind-body connection, something that spiritual bypassing or positive psychology often overlooks.
Pacing and Boundaries: Trauma-informed professionals understand the need to go at a client’s pace, allowing them to process difficult emotions slowly and safely. Unlike some coaching or spiritual practices, which might encourage rapid transformation, trauma recovery is a gradual process that requires patience and care.

How Coaches and Non-Clinical Helpers Can Identify Trauma and Mental Health Issues

It may seem as though I’m being dismissive of the critical role coaches and non-clinical helpers can play in a person’s journey to health and wellness. This is not my intention, as I’ve worked with many coaches who do a phenomenal job and their client’s have nothing but good things to say. I don’t want to diminish or demean the profession in any way. But I’ve also seen incompetent and negligent care that can have life-threatening consequences, so I feel compelled to add some useful tips on how coaches and clients can be aware of their needs and get access to additional care when necessary. Non-clinical helpers may not have the training to diagnose or treat mental health conditions, but there are clear indicators that someone may be struggling with trauma or mental health issues, and these signs suggest a referral to a trauma-informed mental health professional is necessary. Some common red flags include:

Unprocessed or Recurrent Trauma: If a client repeatedly brings up past traumatic events or shows emotional distress when discussing their history, it could be a sign of unresolved trauma. This can manifest as flashbacks, nightmares, or overwhelming emotions that the client struggles to manage.
Extreme Emotional Responses: If a client swings between extremes—such as emotional numbness, withdrawal, or uncontrollable anger—these could be symptoms of trauma, depression, anxiety, or PTSD. Extreme or dissociative responses suggest deeper issues that may require clinical support.
Chronic Anxiety, Depression, or Panic Attacks: Persistent feelings of sadness, worthlessness, anxiety, or panic are common symptoms of mental health conditions. Coaches should refer clients who regularly experience these symptoms to a licensed therapist, as life coaching techniques like reframing or focusing on goals may not be appropriate in these cases.
Difficulty Regulating Emotions: A client who seems unable to manage emotions without becoming overwhelmed or shut down might be dealing with trauma-related dysregulation. This is often a sign that they need professional help to build emotional regulation skills in a safe, trauma-informed space.
Behavioral Red Flags: Self-harm, substance use, or other self-destructive behaviors signal the need for clinical intervention. If a coach observes these behaviors, it’s important to encourage the client to seek specialized help.

How People Seeking Help Can Recognize Bypassing in Coaching or Non-Clinical Support

If you’re working with a coach, spiritual mentor, or another non-clinical helper, it’s important to be mindful of whether they’re inadvertently encouraging bypassing your trauma or mental health symptoms. Here are some signs that spiritual bypassing or emotional avoidance may be occurring:

Overemphasis on Positivity: If your coach or healer continually focuses on “staying positive” or “thinking happy thoughts,” without acknowledging or validating difficult emotions, it may be a sign of bypassing. Trauma and mental health healing require processing pain, not just focusing on optimism.
Minimizing or Invalidating Your Pain: If your coach or healer responds to your struggles with statements like “it could be worse,” “everything happens for a reason,” or “let me tell what I’ve been through,” this can be an attempt to minimize your pain. True healing requires space for grief, sadness, or anger, not dismissal of those feelings.
Pushing for Quick Fixes: Bypassing often involves rushing through emotional healing, with a focus on fast results. If your coach or healer is urging you to “move on” or “just let go” of your trauma without doing the deeper work of emotional processing, it’s time to consider seeking more specialized help.
Lack of Depth in Addressing Trauma: If you sense that your coach avoids discussing your trauma or glosses over your mental health struggles, it may indicate that they are not equipped to handle these issues. They are not expected to be able to handle them, but they should be listening to you, empathizing, and providing referrals for added support beyond their role.

The Importance of Referral to a Mental Health Professional

When non-clinical helpers identify signs of trauma or mental health conditions, a referral to a trauma-informed mental health professional is critical. Coaches, mentors, and spiritual guides can still play a valuable role in someone’s healing journey, but they should understand when a client’s needs go beyond their scope of practice.

Similarly, individuals seeking support should feel empowered to advocate for their own well-being by recognizing when bypassing is happening and ensuring they receive the proper care for deep emotional healing.

Signs a Therapist Should Refer a Client to a Psychiatrist

While therapists provide essential emotional and psychological support, there are times when a client’s needs may go beyond the scope of therapy and require the intervention of a psychiatrist. Therapists must also recognize their limitations and avoid bypassing a client’s legitimate psychiatric or medical needs by continuing to push therapy as the only solution. Here are some key signs that may indicate a client needs psychiatric care:

Severe Mood Instability: Clients experiencing extreme mood swings, such as rapid cycling between depression and mania, may require medication to stabilize their condition, especially in cases of bipolar disorder or severe mood disorders.
Persistent Suicidal Ideation: If a client frequently talks about suicidal thoughts, has a plan, or exhibits other warning signs of suicidal behavior, psychiatric evaluation is necessary to assess the need for hospitalization or medication.
Psychotic Symptoms: Hallucinations, delusions, or disorganized thinking may indicate psychosis or a severe mental health condition like schizophrenia. A psychiatrist can provide a diagnosis and medication to manage these symptoms.
Non-responsive to Therapy: When clients with depression, anxiety, or other mental health conditions don’t respond to therapy alone, they may benefit from psychiatric medication to complement the therapeutic process.
Substance Use Disorders: For clients with severe or chronic substance use issues, psychiatric intervention or referral to addiction treatment may be necessary to manage withdrawal symptoms, cravings, or co-occurring mental health conditions.
ADHD, Neurodivergence, or Past Head Injuries: When clients present with symptoms of ADHD, neurodivergence (autism spectrum), cognitive impairment, or report past injuries that could be contributing to their symptoms, it’s important for a therapist to recognize the complexity in diagnosing these conditions when trauma and mental health symptoms are co-occurring. Referral to a psychiatrist, psychologist, or neuropsychologist for evaluation, testing, and recommendations is essential to ensure comprehensive care.
Underlying Medical Issues: Clients should be routinely encouraged to have labs drawn with a physical examination by a medical professional to rule out medical causes for their symptoms. You don’t want to spend a year working on anxiety and panic only to find out treating a thyroid condition could have helped months ago.

In these cases, a collaborative approach between a therapist and psychiatrist can provide comprehensive care that addresses both the psychological and medical needs of the client.

Seeking the Right Support

While spiritual practices and positive psychology can complement mental health care, they should not be seen as a substitute for addressing trauma or serious mental health issues. If you or someone you know is struggling with trauma, depression, anxiety, or PTSD, it’s important to seek help from a qualified trauma-informed mental health professional.

Healing from trauma is possible, but it requires the right support—one that allows you to acknowledge your pain, process your emotions, and move towards recovery at a pace that feels safe for you. Having the guidance and support of a trained professional who can allow you to feel safe and in-control of your process can make all the difference. Click the link for information on my approach as a trauma focused specialist.

In conclusion, spiritual bypassing and an overemphasis on positivity can hinder true healing by bypassing the deeper work of emotional processing. A trauma-informed approach ensures that you’re not just masking your pain but working through it in a safe, compassionate, and holistic way.

Alex Penrod, MS, LPC, LCDC

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